Who Can Be My Reliable Friend?

Maybe my expectations of a friendship seem too high or maybe less than usual. I usually don’t follow all norms unless it is consistent with my own moral standards. I may be too busy with my favorite hobbies to make time for some social activities, or maybe my introverted character determines my expectations of friendship. I know I don’t feel a need for a friend to just talk about the daily weather. I don’t need a friend to talk about people that don’t affect any of us or society, for example, I don’t care to talk about the private life of his neighbors or colleagues. I don’t need a friend that I have to forcefully find something to talk about.

I’m happier walking alone and listening to music or podcasts than walking with another physical person when there is not a valuable topic to talk about. I like to drink my coffee, tea, and lunch alone at home rather than be in a restaurant with someone and watch the people around us without meaningful conversation. I prefer to exercise alone or watch movies and focus more on my interests. I prefer to study in front of my laptop instead of going to the library to see how others study. I don’t need to feel competitive or motivated to study or do sports or other activities. If there is no mental connection, the physical participation of a person next to me is not only not satisfying me, it discomforts me. I like to focus on the content of the movie instead of paying attention to the person next to me in the cinema. I also don’t want to carry anyone in the name of friendship or be tolerated by anyone else. Well, I can do many activities by myself and enjoy them more than in social settings. I understand that some extroverts may need more social interaction than introverts. I hope no one will judge my expectations as something too unusual, and if so, I don’t want to justify my feelings and opinions about where and how I am comfortable comforts. Instead, I like to get together for some social or political discussion, dance, or play games as a very short extension of friendship. Maybe at the level of acquaintance for a common hobby.

But I always need a reliable friend to share my thoughts, get new ideas, learn new perspectives, hear our honest experiences, and discuss our private, social, or political opinions without thinking and without fear of being judged. With my trusted friend, we take care of each other and are available whenever we need, in difficult situations, to reduce our depression, anxiety, and stress. My trusty friend when I am unable to do something, his/her kind hands are available to help. My reliable friend is brave enough to offer his/her strong shoulder to lean on when I’m down and I’m glad my shoulders can help him/her when he/she needs real, strong, honest shoulders. 

I do not trust a friend who leaves me when he/she feels that I am about to die and is afraid that if I die beside him/her, she/he might be questioned about my death.